Hi Tillilou,
I've had EM for 27 years, since the age of seven so I hope that I can help. My dad is a doctor, so I often ask him about stuff people post. Due to my illness, he had to become an expert on EM! (He's a GP, what is called a family doctor in the US, I think)
1. Depending on what kind of EM you have, it can progress. If your EM is caused by another disease (secondary EM) then it can get worse as the disease that causes it gets worse. It also tends to go through a period of progressing after it first appears, due to causing tissue and nerve damage, but then stabilises.
You also have to wait and see how the seasons affect your EM. Some flares are triggered by the blood vessels shutting down, so cold weather can make EM worse! Without knowing exactly what type of EM you have, it's difficult to say.
2. I often have swollen hands and feet but it is really important to mention this to your doctor, as it can be a side-effect of medication or a problem related to something else you have. My dad once said that one of the worst parts of his job was people with diseases like ours not mentioning things like this. This was because they could either be something he could treat easily, symptoms of something else or symptoms of the disease that just don't get mentioned to doctors, so they don't know about them.
3. I'm probably not much help with this as I live in the UK, but I'll try to find you something similar to what I wear.
4. With my EM, I feel like it's in a constant state of readiness, like a car that has the engine going but hasn't been put in gear yet. It may not be a true flare but it is sore.
This can also be due to nerve damage, but it does sound more like low-level EM.
I think all of us here feel the same way about this site. This is the one place I know that I can post things about my EM and that people will understand. This site can't take our EM away, but it can take away some of the loneliness of having such a rare disease.